Posts Tagged ‘Networking Groups’

Networking: When the Magic Has Died

Thursday, August 5th, 2010

A friend of mine, Jason Alba of Jibber Jobber wrote an excellent post earlier this week on when to leave a networking group. His points were so good that I asked if I could reprint it here.

Take it away, Jason:

I’m not talking about when it’s time to leave a networking event, I’m talking about permanently leaving a group you are in.

A few years ago I networked in a Yahoo Group (an excellent place to network). This group was run by someone with a beautiful smile and a seemingly helpful persona, but I had a different experience than most.

My contributions to this Yahoo Group, with a lot of job seekers, were sincere and helpful. When someone asked a question that I could (or should) answer, I spent a fair amount of time constructing a response that was encouraging and had enough meat that the person would be able to move on.

At least half of my messages never made it to the group. They were flat out rejected by the moderator, who sometimes would construct her own response that had a lot of similarities to my response.

One time, she responded saying that it was HER group, not the Jason Alba group…. by this time I was just about done having all of my free help and thoughts slapped down.

I didn’t want to leave the group for many reasons. This was a large group that was very active and I got as much value as I put into the group (and I put a lot of value into the group). I struggled with leaving for months, and finally I did.

I left the group. I left the opportunity to be known, be helpful, keep my ear to the ground on issues, and get reactions to my ideas.

I was saddened to get to that point, but something unexpected happened.

When I left the group I became liberated. I was elated. Seriously, I was so happy to be out of the control of the group owner, and not have to worry about my contributions being slapped down more than 50% of the time.

No one really knows why I left… I STILL get emails from people that were on that group, wondering where I went. I do wish I could contribute to that group… but being free has been so liberating.

I know some of you go to network events, or network online in certain groups, where you feel quite unappreciated. Perhaps what you bring to the table is undervalued and you are essentially treated poorly (perhaps even abused).

Here’s my advice: leave.

Move on.

Leave the group.

Don’t stay for the others… they’ll eventually figure it out for themselves.

There are two reasons to participate in networking:

* To Give…. of your time, ideas, encouragement, etc.
* To Get…. moral support, ideas, encouragement, etc.

If there comes a time when the management of the group, or event, thinks that you are a threat, it’s better to go somewhere else and do what you do best than to stay there.

You’ll know when it’s time… when the stress weighs on you and you wonder why they keep doing things a certain way (which is wrong) and you keep getting slapped down… it is time to move on.

There were several things I really liked in his post.

1. Networking in a Yahoo Group. Yep, a great place to network.

2. Why we network. To give and to get. He’s completely right, and if a group stops supporting either of those goals, it’s time to leave.

By the way, Jason has a superb on-line contact management system aimed at job seekers. But it can be used by anyone who needs a good contact management system designed for networkers. Check it out for yourself.

Evaluating Your Networking Venue

Friday, March 26th, 2010

Earlier this week I did a post on the Top 10 Networking Mistakes, and #6 was not evaluating your networking venues.

So how do you choose and evaluate? Glad you asked!

Asking for recommendations of good events from your network is a good place to start. Make sure to ask why they are recommending an event. Who are the usual attendees? Are they the kind of people you need/want to meet? Is it primarily a business or social event? If the event sounds like it meets your goals, give it a try.

Networking event calendars will sometimes give you similar information. I love it when an event listing tells me who should attend. That gives me valuable information on whether I should attend. The event might be aimed at people like me. Or it might be aimed at my potential market. Either way is fine by me.

But all the research in the world doesn’t help you out if you don’t actually attend the event. If you think one might work for you, check it out. As you network, evaluate the other people there. Are these who you expected? If not, ask some questions. Events are like people. They have good days and bad days. Check to see if this might be an unusual crowd.

If you made good contacts, then obviously you’ll want to list this one as one to try again. If it didn’t work for you, I still suggest giving it at least one more try. Might have been an off day.

Even if you think it’s a good event and you continue to go back, don’t hesitate to reevaluate after 6 months or a year. Your goals may have changed. The event may have changed. The same goes for an event you decided not to attend. If someone mentions it as being a good event, give it another look.

Don’t let peer pressure influence you too much. I’ve been told there are events I HAVE to attend. Then I go and realize they are a waste of time. Yes, it’s awkward to tell someone “thanks for the recommendation, but it’s not for me.” But that’s much better than attending an event regularly that wastes your time.

Just because your best friend loves it doesn’t mean you have to.

When you look at your networking calendar for a month, make sure you are using your time wisely. Time is too precious to waste on bad events.

Don’t Do Anything You Really Don’t Like!

Monday, January 11th, 2010

This can be a dangerous piece of advice, so let me clarify. When you begin to make changes in your networking strategy, you are going to have to move out of your comfort zone. After all, if everything you are comfortable with is working well, there would be no need to change. Moving out of your comfort zone can be scary. It may mean doing things you don’t like. But as you get more comfortable with the new activities, you may find that the thing you hated at first ends up being a lot of fun.

For example, I used to hate evening networking mixers. I don’t drink alcohol, and the venues are often loud and crowded. But I needed to work them, if for no better reason than I needed to be able to advise my clients how to work them effectively. Hard to do if you’ve never done it yourself. So I forced myself out of my comfort zone and went to them. I did all the things I had advised my clients: set goals, talked to new people, etc. And guess what? They aren’t that bad. They still aren’t my most favorite or effective way to network, but I can do them. And I have made some very good connections at them. And I would have missed those great connections if I hadn’t talked myself into moving out of my comfort zone.

That said, I do them as little as possible. There are other ways of networking that I enjoy far more. And I pick the events that are most effective for me. I don’t just do them to do them because I “should.”

And it’s okay for you to do the same. Just because someone tells you “Hey, this is great. You should do it too” doesn’t mean you have to. Give it a fair try. If it works, continue it. If it doesn’t, stop. The minute networking becomes a “chore” is the minute you will give it up.

And that would be too bad. Networking is the best source of job security I have ever found. So stop worrying about the right or wrong way to do it. Do what works for you. Try something new every so often, but mostly just do it.

Networking at Non-Membership Based Organizations

Thursday, October 29th, 2009

A client and I were discussing this yesterday. He recently left a networking group he’d been a part of for almost five years, and while he misses the people, he doesn’t miss the group politics. He said he used to spend 10-15 hours a week dealing with the politics in the group.

Other than my local Chamber of Commerce, I have not been part of a membership-based networking group for more than a year now, and this conversation made me realize how much more time I have to work and build relationships. I was able to cut back the minutes on my cell phone plan because I don’t burn up so many on “But he said…” and “But she said…” conversations. I’m not sure I could have maintained a blog or social media a year ago. Now, I have the time.

Most of the places I network now, I can walk in, meet people and walk right back out and go home. No staying after for “the meeting after the meeting.” No phone calls 15 minutes later to hear about the latest thing some member did.

Am I saying quit membership-based groups? No. What I am saying is monitor your time. When you spend more time dealing with group politics than you are spending doing real networking, it might be time to make a change. Perhaps resigning from a leadership position. Or setting boundaries on the conversations you will participate in.

Anyone else have a story to share?

Know Your Events

Wednesday, September 9th, 2009

I was attending Capital Cabal last night. It’s a good event, and if you are in the greater Washington DC area, I highly recommend it.

Every time I attend this event, or others, I usually get the question, “Do you get a lot out of this event?” Well, unless it’s my first time at a particular event, I don’t tend to continue to go if I don’t get much out of it. But what I am looking to get out of an event depends.

For example, I attend the McLean Estate Planning Council most months. I don’t expect to get clients from it. That’s not why I go. But many of the people in my network want to connect with attorneys and financial planners. So I take people with me to the event, which allows me to introduce them, both to the event and to the people they want to meet.

First Friday Networking at the Women’s Business Center of Northern VA is another story. That is an excellent event for me to find clients and potential strategic partners, and that makes it my “can’t miss” event every month.

So always know your event and what you can expect to get out of it. Be open to some events being productive for reasons other than getting clients. Make your plans accordingly, and get more from your networking events.

Get Involved!

Friday, September 4th, 2009

Many people join a networking group, Chamber of Commerce or some other organization and expect that referrals will happen as if by magic.

But it doesn’t work that way. You have to get involved to get something out of an organization. Being busy is good. But if you are too busy to volunteer, attend meetings, etc., how do we know you won’t be too busy to help our referrals?

Volunteering can help us see how you work. If I’ve been side by side with someone, organizing an event, membership drive, washing dishes, or whatever, I know a lot more about that person and how they respond to pressure than if I just meet over coffee.

You have to be seen to be remembered. And that’s one of the best reasons to show up to mixers and other meetings. I admit it. If I know several people in a particular profession, I tend to refer the one I’ve seen or talked to more recently. And I know I’m not alone in that. Showing up at mixers may mean you are the one seen last.

One last point. We can’t do everything, and most people in an organization understand that. So if you do volunteer for something, and then can’t make the commitment, say something. Don’t just keep on doing nothing and letting the organization down. Remember, we’re seeing how you work. If you can’t admit to us that you are swamped, how do we think you’ll treat our referrals?

Caveat Networker

Wednesday, August 12th, 2009

I wanted to share this story to illustrate why you need to be careful with whom you use for a service provider. We all want to assume that people who share our networking groups are the people we want to support with our business. As with anything in life, do your due diligence and use caution.

I have a client who was excited to tell me about the company he had just hired to help him with website promotion. They were setting him up with Pay Per Click, guaranteed his website would be at the top of Google and were going to work with him on his email newsletter. They were in the same networking group and had just done a one on one meeting, which was how my client had learned about him.

As it happened, I had just had a phone conversation with a company offering similar services, so I asked a few more questions. A telling answer was cost. My client was going to be charged $500 a month for this service. That raised a red flag, because the company I had been talking to charged half that.

I don’t want to say that paying less is always the best approach. That’s not what this is about. Price is only part of the picture. The “guaranteed top of Google” was another red flag. I’ve been doing some research on SEO, and it’s certainly possible, but it’s difficult, and that guarantee is a pretty high bar.

So I did some research on the company. My client gave me the website, and when I visited, I was unimpressed. There was little to no content on the site. Each page was a description of a service with a “Get a Quote” button at the bottom. There was a page for “Sample Website Design,” but to access that page, you already had to be a client! To contrast, the company I had been talking to gives away a lot of information and uses those give-aways as a way to gauge interest in their services.

I did one final test. I did a search for the company on Google. I tried various keyword combinations, and no matter what I tried, I couldn’t find them on the first six pages. I don’t know anyone who searches farther than that.

I wrote back to my client something to the effect of “if they can’t do what they promise for themselves, what confidence do you have that they can do it for you?”

By the way, the company I had been talking to, Hubspot, does show up on the first page of Google if you search for “Inbound Marketing” and on the second page if you search for “Internet Marketing.”

The moral of this story? Just because you share a networking group with someone does not guarantee they are the best company for you to use.

Anyone else have a good story to share?